Monogamy Meaning: One Partner at a Time

Monogamy meaning across four uses

1. Marriage. The practice or rule of being married to only one person at a time. Most countries' marriage laws are built on this idea.
2. Relationships. A committed relationship, married or not, in which the two partners are romantically and sexually exclusive.
3. Biology. A mating system in which one male and one female form a pair, at least for a breeding season, and often raise young together.
4. Older sense. In past centuries the word could mean marrying only once in a whole lifetime, refusing to remarry after a spouse died. This use is now rare.

Monogamy vs polygamy, bigamy and related words

Laws on marriage differ between countries and, in some places, between religious communities, so whether a second marriage is legal depends on where and under which law it happens. Fidelity is a related but separate idea: it means faithfulness, keeping the promise a couple has made, whatever that promise is.

Examples in sentences

• For them, monogamy was never in question; they had both wanted one partner for life.
• The documentary explained that only a small share of mammal species practise monogamy.
• She described her twenties as serial monogamy: three long relationships, one after another.
• The couple's counsellor asked them to talk openly about what monogamy meant to each of them.
• Swans and some seabirds are famous for monogamous pair bonds.

Monogamy in animals

Biologists separate two ideas. Social monogamy means a pair lives together, shares territory and raises young. Genetic monogamy means all the offspring really belong to that pair. Many birds are socially monogamous, but genetic tests show that a share of chicks in some species have a different father. Among mammals, true monogamy is uncommon; examples often cited include some wolves, beavers, gibbons and certain voles. So when a nature programme says a species "mates for life," it usually means social monogamy.

Origin of the word

English picked up monogamy in the 1610s. French monogamie passed it along, itself from a Late Latin borrowing of Greek monogamia. It joins monos, single or alone, with gamos, marriage. The same -gamy ending appears in polygamy, bigamy and exogamy (marrying outside one's group). Interestingly, the earliest English sense was marrying only once in a lifetime; the modern sense of one spouse at a time is recorded about a century later. The adjective monogamous appears in the eighteenth century, used of animals as well as people.

Exclusivity, agreements and current talk

In law and religion, monogamy is often an expected or required form of marriage. In everyday talk, it usually refers to an agreement between partners. Couples may say they are "monogamous" to describe exclusivity, and people discussing open or polyamorous relationships use "non-monogamous" for arrangements where other partners are allowed by agreement. Views on these choices vary widely across cultures, faiths and families, and this page describes the words rather than judging the choices.

For connected words, see infidelity, spouse and platonic, or explore the relationship and feelings vocabulary.